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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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Unfortunately hoarding is a mental disease. If the person is hoarding in their old age, it is probably not because they just don't know how to handle too much stuff. Helping them get rid of their stuff just makes them angrier if they are not first getting mental help. If they don't think they need mental help, or if they have already gone into dementia, it has been my experience that those closest to the person are not useful in ending the cycle. It is better to get a completely disinterested third party to help them unbury themselves. We always hurt the ones we love, as the saying goes. My mom literally saves trash and throws away useful things and then gets mad at us because she believes we are making her get rid of the things she needs. She is very unwell in this matter and I am afraid she will end up on the streets if she doesn't die from sheer anger.
Fortunately, the 84-year old gentleman I helped out of his hoarding mess recognized his hoarding behavior as unhealthy when he saw the hoarding show on TV. He stopped bringing things into the house, but it was too late as code enforcement/the city attorney's office were ready to place his home into receivership (force him out, demolish, re-sell it to the highest bidder to recover their costs). The pandemic had just been declared, so I was able to keep him in his house while we worked for over a year to bring his surroundings up to code enforcement's satisfaction. It was not easy as he foresaw being able to sell the hundreds of video cassette tapes in 10 years for good money "because no one else will have them." I asked him to visualize his life in 10 years...he wanted to be able to sit in his living room, listening to his vast collection of music (albums stacked to the ceiling) and reading his Reader's Digest. I reminded him of this scene often and one day, he put all the boxes of video cassettes in the dumpster all on his own. This was huge for him, but for the house, a small feat. It was not easy and I am not a mental health professional, but I kept him focused on what was important: keeping his home. And he was able to make the changes on his own.
I knew my mother was filling her pockets and rollator with food, toilet paper, Kleenex and the cats' toys, but I never realized until now all that she was hoarding. I am in the process of going through all her stuff and boxing most of it up. Imagine my surprise when I discovered my tablet cord, charger and carrying case in one of her purses that she doesn't use. In another purse I found my Burt's Bees lip softener and my green tea lip softener in another. In a third I found one of her bras and two pairs of my socks. In the fourth purse I found three nail clippers. All this stuff I thought had walked off and hid under chairs, etc and all along she was picking the stuff up and "keeping it safe?" Thank goodness she picked up relatively safe items and not anything that could harm her or anyone else in the house. But then again, I'm just getting started.
Hoarding as elderly! I must admit I have been touched for a very long time especially when it comes to tools. Now at 67 I am forced to move and face the huge task of cleaning everything up. I hit my head and say why! The good thing is I see a new life ahead after the purge.
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Dangers of Hoarding Behavior Become More Severe With Age